TOC Exclusive: Otto Fong’s Open Letter
Monday, 10 September 2007, 10:00 pm | 290 views
Theonlinecitizen has obtained a copy of the original blog entry by Raffles Institution teacher, Otto Fong. It also includes comments which were originally posted by readers of his article.
The original posting on his own blog has since been taken down.
AN OPEN LETTER FROM OTTO FONG
I am Otto Fong. I have been teaching Science in Raffles Institution for the last eight years.
Being a teacher has been the most rewarding part of my professional life thus far. My students continue to amaze me daily with their wit, maturity, independent thinking and leadership. It is very fulfilling that I am a part of an institution that moulds the future generation of Singapore’s leaders.
Leaders are people who can rise above the tide of popular opinion, people who are guided by the conviction of rightness and justice and in being so guided, lead others towards that right path.
Recent events leading to my action
Recent events have made me decide to write this open letter. In April this year, Minister Mentor Mr Lee Kuan Yew – one of the school’s greatest alumni – called homosexuality a “genetic variation”, questioning the validity of criminalising gay sex. In July, MP Baey Yam Keng expressed support for the repeal of Section 377A of the penal code (which criminalises gay sex acts). In August, Malaysian columnist and ordained pastor Oyoung Wenfeng released his inspiring new Mandarin book “Tong Gen Sheng”, encouraging gay men and women to come out of the closet.
A few evenings later, I attended a forum organised by People Like Us on gay teachers and students. A few brave twenty-something guys asked, “Why has there been so little guidance available to me as a gay teenager?” It was a question that I had asked myself often, growing up.
When I became a teacher in 1999, I looked back on the good guidance my own teachers gave me as a template, and tried to be a better teacher to my students. Besides teaching them Science, I spent considerable effort in imparting good social values: give up your seats to the needy, save the handicapped parking lot for those in wheelchairs and their caretakers, respect people regardless of profession or social status.
How hate is perpetuated
Yet, in the eight years I have taught, I have done little for that small group of students who are gay. When the religious group Focus on the Family masqueraded as sex guidance counselors and gave a talk full of misinformation about homosexuality to our students, I was furious but kept my mouth shut.
When my niece returned from school saying, “Gays are disgusting!” I knew she learnt that hatred from a classmate, who had in turn absorbed that hatred from a parent. I knew that this hatred has been perpetrated for generations. But hatred grew out of fear, and hatred, as a line in a movie goes, “leads to the Dark Side.” This is the same environment of hatred I grew up in, as a gay teenager and student.
Until Section 377A* is repealed, there will be precious little the Ministry of Education can do to help these students. As a teacher, I am bound by my professional duty to follow the directives of my superiors.
While these events helped crystallize my decision to come out of the closet, my motivation remains deeply personal.
My family and I
As far back as primary six, I have been aware of my attraction towards classmates of the same sex. For those who argued about nurturing factors of the family, my brother and sister grew up under the same parents and remained heterosexuals despite growing up with me in close proximity.
As a teenager, I was very quick to sense society’s aversion towards the ’sissies’ in my classes. I worked hard to distance myself from them. While I was successful in modifying my outward behavior, my sexual orientation remained unchanged. My denial gnawed at me, and the suppression of my true self resulted in self-destructive behavior during my overseas university years.
Fortunately, my American fraternity mates were supportive. I began to see a counselor who helped me accept myself for who and what I am.
Returning to Singapore, I came out to my family. My father, mother, brother and sister, out of love for their son and brother, walked the long road to acceptance. It was not easy for them, but they loved me before I came out, and they love me after. When I finally settled down with my longtime companion (we have been together for more than nine years), my entire family made sure my nieces and nephews included us in their lives. I loved my family too much to keep them in the dark, to deny them the chance to really know me. And they loved me too much to let some old prejudice tear our family apart.
I kept my sexual orientation a secret at work, and only a handful of my colleagues knew about me.
I don’t want to be a bonsai tree
Not counting my childhood, I have spent more than twenty years in the professional closet. I am nearing my fourth decade on Earth. While I have had some successes in life, I am not content to be just average. As I have often told my students, “Why be average when you can be your best?”
Do you know what a bonsai tree is? A bonsai tree is an imitation of a real tree. It is kept in a small pot with limited nutrients, trimmed constantly to fit someone else’s whim. It looks like a real tree, except it can’t do many things a real tree can. It cannot provide shelter, it cannot find food on its own; its life and death are totally reliant on its owner. It is the plant version of the 3-inch Chinese bound foot for women: useless and painful.
Being in the closet, pretending to be straight, trimming our true selves to suit the whims and expectations of others, is just like being a human bonsai tree. By staying in the closet, we cannot even hope to be average, much less above and beyond average.
I felt that in order to reach my fullest potential as a useful human being, I must first fully accept myself, and face the world honestly. I have lived long enough to know that what I am is not a disease, an aberration or a mental illness.
Hate is not a religious value
Many people have cited many ‘reasons’ for hating homosexuals, just as many people tried to justify their views that the Earth was flat, that the darker skinned should always be inferior, and that women should subjugate their lives to men. The teachings of the world’s great religious traditions offer many words of wisdom, but the interpretations of their human followers are not infallible. As Jesus said in his Sermon on the Mount (yes, a personal Bible was given to me by a great lady and I honored her by reading the book), we must love our neighbors as ourselves. It is a simple teaching, but one that’s rarely followed by those who seek to oppress people different from themselves. The path to enlightenment always faces stubborn resistance. As Mahatma Gandhi said, “First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you…”
There are some people who are using homosexuality to advance their personal ambitions vis a vis religion. They claim that the homosexual ‘agenda’ is to make the whole world gay and threaten the stability of the family. Yet, let us examine the evidence: Denmark, Norway and Sweden, the first countries to legalise gay marriage, are more stable than ever – their population has not been converted by gays and their heterosexual divorce rates have even decreased since gays have been afforded legal rights. (William N. Eskridge, Jr and Darren R. Spedale, Oxford University Press, 2006).
The only agenda gay people have is to be able to live with the same rights and dignity as our heterosexual brothers and sisters. Our very vocal opponents are the ones actively preying on innocent people, recruiting them to their cause by spreading fear and misinformation. I hope thinking people will quickly see that it is this small group of vocal objectionists who have a more dangerous agenda, that their fight with gay people has nothing to do with what’s right or wrong, but is merely a litmus test of their political influence. For peace and prosperity to continue, Singapore must always uphold secularism, where each different segment of the population respects the beliefs and rights of the others.
Can a country with no natural resources afford to drive away its own citizens?
There is a very pragmatic reason that you should support the rights and dignity of gay Singaporeans: in this globally-competitive era, Singapore needs her gay sons and daughters, just as we need our Singaporean Muslims, Buddhists, Christians, Hindus, immigrants, men and women, old folks and young. Most importantly, we need those gay sons and daughters because those gay sons and daughters are Singaporean Muslims, Buddhists, Christians, Hindus, immigrants, men and women, old folks and young. Can a country without natural resources continue to flourish when it starts to drive away its own children?
As I said before, leaders are people who are guided by the conviction of rightness and justice and in being so guided, lead others towards that right path.
I am still a teacher. My main purpose and joy is to teach our youngest citizens, the same ones who will be the leaders of our nation tomorrow. But, I feel I am shortchanging both society and myself by staying in the closet. I must be true to myself. If my colleagues and students, both gay and straight, see that being true to one’s own self has great value, perhaps we can produce a new generation who is truly courageous. A new generation of young people who are proud to be themselves, no matter what difference they have from their classmates. Then I will have succeeded in providing them a better education than I had the opportunity to receive during my years in school.
So here’s what I am, and I am a friend in need at the moment
So here it is: I, Otto Fong, have always been and always will be a gay man. When you ask about my spouse, I will say he is a man. I am as proud being gay as you are proud being straight. I am not, as some people like to label gays, a pedophile, a child molester, a pervert or sexual deviant. I did not choose to be gay, just like heterosexuals did not choose to be straight. I am not going to hell (not for being gay anyway).
I am not going back in the closet. When you ask me who I am, I will answer: I am a son, a brother, a long-time companion, an uncle, a teacher, a classmate, a colleague, a part of your community, a HDB dweller, a Singaporean. And I am also gay.
I would like to enjoy the respect that all other Singaporeans enjoy. I will not let the closet bind my feet, because I am made to sprint. I am not interested in being a bonsai tree, my DNA is programmed to climb higher. My heart aspires to reach my fullest potential as a human being.
I hope, dear friends and colleagues, that you look back and remember what I am, and see that I am not someone you fear. I am essentially the same person – flawed, imperfect, but brought up properly by two loving parents to lead a productive, beneficial and meaningful life. My friends and family love me for who I am, and I hope you can too. I come out to you with as much hope and trepidation as when I first come out to my mother and father. Your support and understanding are very important to me at this moment.
Thank you, may you prosper in health and soul.
Yours sincerely,
Otto Fong
8th Sept 2007
Comments:
christao17 said…
Yeah, Otto! Tawn and I are so proud of you! You’ll certainly face resistence, ignorance, and hostility - but you’ll be pleasantly surprised with how much more support, affection, and appreciation you receive. Best regards!
Bong said…
GO SIR!
As an ex-student from RI, your sexuality was never in doubt. Although you have never taught me, you came across to me as a very cheerful, artistically inclined teacher 
I remember how you tried to teach us how to draw cartoons with your workshops.
Now that you have decided to open up, I can only wish you all the best in your struggle against societal views. I don’t know if this is the right media to open up to, or if the timing is right, or if you have taken precautionary steps beforehand to protect yourself, but one thing that is undeniable is your concern for youths. A simple question of “why has there been so little guidance available to me as a gay teenager?” contributed to this courageous move, by appealing to your “teacherish”/personal instincts to come clean. That is a mark of a great teacher
Bless you
-Lim Bing Li (class of 2005)
Jock said…
Hi Otto,
Firstly, I want to let you know that I admire and respect your decision to come out to your friends and especially to the people you work with. I am sure you have thought this through and have the support of your partner, family and your friends.
I will never understand your motivations for choosing a public media like this to reveal such personal insights about yourself and how it can help you be a better teacher and colleague.
What it will only do is provoke a knee jerk reaction from your school, the school’s board and the parents of the students who are paying high tuitions fees to pay your salary. Unfortunately, the group that will stand to lose most are your students, whom you have been an inspiring and admirable teacher, guide, mentor and friends to.
I truly believe that it is time for a change. But I don’t believe that RI, MOE or Singapore is ready to contemplate having a male gay teacher, especially in an all boys school. I may be wrong, but I foresee that in the knee jerk reaction, you will be asked to leave the school. The students, that you so hope to provide guidance to with this announcement will then be deprived of that guidance by such a forward looking teacher like you.
I do sincerely hope that your actions will lead to a positive change in your students, your school and Singapore.
1029 said…
=)
a great read, and great to know. like it or not, i have so many gay friends who are teachers that i have lost count. you made the right decision, and it is time. if not, you wouldn’t have done it.
all the best.
‘ [ gAnNie ] said…
Dear Mr Fong, regardless of your sexuality, you’ll still always be one of our greatest ever teachers.
We believe that your decision to announce this in public media like a blog is not an uncalculated one. Right now we are feeling afraid for you for the potential backlash that you will get. The world isn’t perfect; we have learnt that through our experiences and what you have taught us. The backlash will be great, people being people, gossip will spread like wildfire.
RI’s motto reads “Auspicium Melioris Aevi”. Hope of a better age. Its ironic in a sense that the direction this school is taking may not be relating to this ideal you are strongly advocating. Even right now as this is being typed, people we know, students you might like, are already having an adverse reaction to this. On msn people are reacting. This is life, Headmaster may know, but whatever his stand is, diplomatic or not, do not worry. You are more than justified in being unique and being a special person. Live in that glory, have self belief.
We as leaders under you for two years have seen how you set the foundation for us and pushed us forward. Where we are now, especially in our cca leadership has come from you. We strongly believe that your teaching is too valuable to be compromised because of sexual orientation. RI cant lose this gem. We hope they don’t.
Life in 1E and 2E would have been extremly boring and uneventful if not for your being our FT and we greatly appreciate what you’ve done for us in our lower sec years.
To us, you were definitely more of a teacher than any other teachers we ever had; especially in light of your post. Hence, we thank you for everything and my family supports you in every way too.
Again, this is not a letter in which Si Yuan and Eugene are following the crowd to write letters to you. This is a sincere encouragement to the ideals in which you push for, however faint and unrealistic they seem at the present moment. Eugene “I being a Christian, I know that my religion does not condone this, but I tell you that Christianity is not a religion of rules and strict restrictions. It is one of love and acceptance.” Keep that in mind.
We being your students who have looked up to you so much, admittedly are shocked, but are certain that our respect for you will never change. To end this, we only have to say, expect the worst, its life, but hope for the best, and know that amongst the group of people behind you. Family, partner, friends, you have Yeo Si Yuan and Eugene Gan as well.
We wish you the best!
Yours sincerely
Yeo Si Yuan (Asst. Monitor 0′5, Monitor ‘06), Eugene Gan (Treasurer ‘05,’06)
Ng Yi-Sheng said…
Thanks, Otto. I’ve read both your comic books - “Sir Fong” and “Sir Fong 2″, so I know about your love of teaching and I can see how brave a step this is. I wish you the best of luck in school, and I only wish my own gay teachers had been as open as you.
skinnylatte said…
I applaud you. Your decision, whatever the implications, makes a difference.
Adrianna
http://www.popagandhi.com
Kevin said…
Mr Otto, as a fairly straight person, I must admit it’s hard to realize the social prejudice faced by someone in the gay community in Singapore.
Aside from your clear documentation of local events, it’s neat that you’ve share your cross-cultural experience as well, so we know how social support structures could be improved.
Finally, I find it quite appropriate that you’ve shared this on your blog, and I do hope more readers / bloggers are encouraged to bear a more open mind and a supportive heart.
–
Kevin Lim
http://theory.isthereason.com
kohfamey said…
Hi Mr Fong. I’m Jie Kai, and I worked with you in a play about 7 years ago, back when I was in RI. This is a very brave decision you are taking. I wish you all the best.
Randuwa said…
Otto,
Your words and your act of integrity is being discovered all around the world. I am also a teacher, 23 years in the elementary school level here in the United States. For the past 13, I have had the privilege of working for a school district where my being gay was no more important than my wearing a green shirt to school! I know it’s not so easy in Singapore. You have all my well wishes.
randy
randuwa.blogspot.com
Sivasothi said…
Dude, what a powerful letter! It was also inspiring to read your student’s comments. You sound like an insightful and dedicated teacher, well done.
All the best.
numbernine said…
Hi,
As an old boy I’ve always found that RI, in spite of its ambivalent attitudes towards unconventional sexuality, has always been a more tolerant place than many would expect. A teacher who taught my year was transgendered. A student from my year was gay. He came out of the closet after he left school but many of us suspected he was gay anyhow. (Later on, the aforementioned student became the subject of controversy when he was dismissed from his post of relief teacher with no explanation given.)
I was also involved (only a bit part) in a drama production which tackled the topic of homosexuality. It won the drama feste, even though admittedly the rest of the script was quite ordinary, so I think the judges were applauding its courage.
I bring all these up because the RI that I studied in did give a fair bit of leeway to homosexuals / transgendered people. I don’t want it to be easy for other people to say “RI is supposed to be like ___” (insert euphemism for “intolerant”).
Because the RI that was so much a part of my youth and growing up was not like that.
Monkey said…
I really applaud you. I have so many gay friends who are as you said, in a professional closet and I think you’ve a great leap forward. This letter was superbly well written and expressed so much love and if nothing else, I can tell you are a great teacher just from reading these words. Indeed, who is there to give students the objective perception of other sexualities in our school systems! We need more like you
Colin said…
Well done, Otto. I wish you courage and all the best in the tough days ahead. Thank you for standing up and to be counted.
Lucian said…
This is my personal opinion (insert standard disclaimer).
MOE should fire you.
Only if they’re willing to fire all heterosexual teachers working in schools which have students of the opposite sex.
Thanks for being courageous. We could definitely have a litle more openness and straight (pardon the pun) talk.
loupgarou said…
you are so brave in homophobic singapore..(ok lah,.. only the extremist xtian sects are homophobes)
Saltwetfish said…
Great courage, well done!
Miak said…
we stand with you.
truth, love and courage will stand all trials and tribulations, and there are no greater values to teach the next generation but these
d8nnis said…
You share the same name as my BF!
I’m proud of you coming out, doing the things you believe in.
I live overseas, not because of prejudice, as you get those everywhere in the world (except SFO, AMS and SYD) but also of better opportunities.
I do not think it’s a Singapore issue. We should not have an arguement based on religion. We should also not base our arguement on the pink dollar.
We should leave Politics, Religion and Capitalism out of the picture.
Why should equality be debated on those? We should just have equality regardless, Period.
Eileena said…
Wonderful! I remember you from Oyoung’s “Tong Gen Sheng” launch, glad that you took the big step to come out. Take care and keep well!
Sandy said…
I am so glad the hear that the law may be repealed in Singapore in the near future. I am looking forward to a world where everyone is accepted for who they are everywhere. No prejudices or bigotry. My best to you.
guapochino said…
We are so proud of you! Way to go! I think you have just shown the way. We’re proud to stand behind you and give you our full support!
jeff said…
Wow! this is definitely great!! and wishes more people will have some time to read it.
Bravo Otto, you are fantastic, brave and motivated.
Email this to a Friend
Bookmark this
Hi dude
I am straight and married with Kids and I have lots of respect for gays and people like you.
Be free, be you.
For those with a rather shallow mindset.
Please forgive them and heal.
Cheers and god bless!
JFK
[...] I just realised that The Online Citizen also has a copy of the original entry along with the comments left by his former students. [...]
I am so damn proud of you, Mr Otto. You are already having a good effect on your 2 students who wrote in their support. Of course RI will support you. The old boys will expect nothing less! Towards a better age, and boy - you sure as hell is showing the way! BRAVO!
Taken from Fridae:
A Citizen,
Thanks for the heads up.
[...] Update: Copies of the letter from his post have been reproduced here and here. [...]
[...] the meantime, if you want to form your own conclusions, you can access the open letter here Filed under [...]
i wonder what homosexual values otto was expousing?
his want to impart good social values? his desire to be honest? his willingness to stand up for what he believes in? his passion to teach the younger generation what is right?
Well done Otto - I am very encouraged by what I read here. You are truly an inspiration. I am also very happy to read the reaction here, all of which has been extremely positive and supportive of your actions. If the MOE thinks that Otto is the only gay teacher in Singapore - then they are seriously deluding themselves. There are, were and always will be homosexuals in the teaching profession - it is just the climate of homophobia which keeps them in the closet. It doesn’t stop them from becoming great teachers though.
Otto,
It takes great courage to speak truth to power and resolute strength to overcome the prejudices of little people who do not understand.
I wish you well and you have my utmost respect and support.
How typical of the higher beings in our ministry deciding what is the best interests of us common folks. Have they read at all the response from his students past and present?
I salute you, Otto. As an old boy, I am glad the present boys can learn the values of true courage and authenticity from a teacher like you. Coincidentally two of my closest friends in RI and RJC are gay, and I sincerely hope your action would result in a proper support/guidance provided for gay teenagers, something which my friends didn’t have back then.
Towards a better age - thank you for showing us the way
Class of 1991
My congratulations and thanks to Mr. Fong. The time never seems right to speak the truth, and then, of course, once someone has courage enough to do it, it becomes a question of, why didn’t anybody say this sooner?
While I’m not surprised by the MOE’s response, I’m very proud of Otto for both his pride and bravery. The impact he has had on his students - the POSITIVE impact - will be widespread. The negative impact he has had? The only negative impact (in the eyes of the anti-gay zealots) is that some students tainted by their parents’ bigotry may begin to challenge their assumptions, and I think that’s an impact we can all live with.
I’m not too sure why the commotion about gay’s right. Lesbian is also on the increase. Why just focus mainly on gay ? How about lesbian ? All sex are equal. I just see the number of lesbian has just the same issue as gay.
I am not a statistician, pastor or politician. However, I find gays are often, the kindest and gentlest of people. I prefer them anytime to some with a holier than thou attitude!
Sir, being an old boy of RI, I really do applaud your effort in showing the courageous side of you to others to open up. When I was your student in lower secondary, I respected you greatly for a teacher as well as a friend. After reading your post, I would like to say that you now have my utmost respect not just as a teacher, a friend, but as well as a person.
Not many people dare to open up, especially in a relatively conservative society like ours, and your courage in speaking up with regards to this issue is indeed admirable. Sir, though the tide may be turned against you, all I want to say is, remember the people around you, your loved ones, we will always stand by you.
No matter what you do, you will still remain in our hearts as one of the role models who set out to educate the young and guide them along the right path.
I sincerely wish you all the best
is TOC a gay haven? why is the whole website littered with gay stuff?
so gay!
Hi Puzzled,
TOC is not a gay site. Otto’s case is the main thing happening on the net right now. So, naturally, we’re giving it the most coverage. It was the same when the Li Hongyi saga happened.
Don’t worry, we’re not a gay site - though I wouldn’t see anything wrong with it if we were..
*Comments disallowed for irrelevance to the article.
Dear Robert Teh,
Your posting will be removed because it has no relevance to the article on Otto Fong.
I will be replying to your email privately. I think some things are best kept private, don’t you agree?
regards,
Andrew
Salute TOC! We are finally reaching there, at last I see the light! Great one Otto, you are really a brave man. I am inspired to do the same only I fear losing my job.
Apparently, from the witnesses of his students and those who know Otto, his sexuality doesn’t seem to intrude with his professionalism in teaching.
Reading his original blog post, I am quite touched with his words. He comes across as someone who has his head firmly fixed on his shoulders and his heart in exactly the right place.
Thing is, when MOE and RI pressured him to remove his post, aren’t they effectively saying: “Please don’t be honest”?
I always wondered: Doesn’t that teach kids that first, it is ok to pretend to be something you are not? Second, that if society disapprove of who you are, you should keep quiet and shut up?
And third, is honesty not the best policy anymore?
I think if MOE and RI had taken a different stance, things would be so much different - and better. Just imagine the lessons our kids would have learnt!
But as it is, our kids have only learnt the above 3 points - all of which would be negative.
Now, who are the ones talking about values again?
Otto,
From someone in Hong Kong who is inspired by your courage. I will be circulating this site to my contacts here. I hope you may remain in teaching; honest men like you should be honoured by your colleagues and students.
Nigel Collett
I think the significance of people coming out is basically this: they just want to say that they’re not hiding anymore. They may not be normal but it’s nothing to be ashamed of. And even if they have to suffer discrimination, they are not suffering it silently anymore.
It is also an affront to the MOE: they sacked Alfian but hired this guy for 8 years. (Although he was more discreet about his orientation - until now.)
It would sound evil if the MOE said to him, “sit down and shut up, get back in the closet. We only hired you because you kept your mouth shut about this.” But it would sound less evil if they were to say, “you are highlighting the conflict that’s going on over the gay issue you are tainting the school, people could think there’s some infighting going on” or “people will think that pupils at our school are doing it with each other”. Then he backs down. But the effect is the same.
It’s still OK. People can still cut and paste. Would you think that people didn’t know what Wee Shu Min wrote just because she took it down? That’s now how the internet works.
I’d like to congratulate this guy for coming out, but in an ideal world, it should be as prosaic as me standing on a soap box and saying “I’m straight! I have sex with women!” and people around me trying to stifle yawns, and saying “so f**king what”. I’d like to yawn at him and say “ho hum big deal” but it’s not like that yet and we’ve got a long way to go before we get there.
Objections to homoxuality come mainly from the Christian right. Chinese may disapprove, but not as loudly. In any case both Buddhism and Taoism are opposed to dualistic thinking. Peranakans don’t object at all. Malays are tolerant, even though they’re Muslim. Don’t know about Indians. But the main problem is with the Christian right. Homophobia has never had that much to do with Asian values. RI may be a school founded by a white man but the followers of the white man’s book shouldn’t be telling us what to do and how to think.
i salute you for your honesty, but what is the right value of a gay? I accept your choice but definitely not my kind of value. unfortunately, your honesty is going to give you even more problem than you can think off.
best wishes.
[...] in RI just published an open letter in his blog about his coming out…To see the letter, click here… Just like a cicada in the night, the gay community is seldom seen but we always know of [...]
Dear Otto Fong,
I salute you for your courage. If MOE ever decides to fire you (touch wood), it will be their loss. You are an wonderful teacher.
[...] A teacher in RI has come out of the closet after many long years with an open letter similar to the one written by one Derek Wee last year. He’s been teaching at the school for 8 years now, and if all the numerous testimonials that he’s received from past and present students, both online as well as offline are to be believed, he is a very very good teacher. In short, he fits the mould perfectly, as the heart and soul of the class, as the mentor who inspires his students to learn. [...]
Touching, eloquent letter. Thank you for teaching us to see beyond our own internalised prejudices against gay people and learn to accept and embrace diversity.
Dear Otto,
Be strong!
Thank you for your inspiring post… I admire your courage and I fully support you in this
Just curious: Has anyone seen any reports in the mainstream media about this incident? Seems like there is a news blackout or something…
Dear Mr Fong,
I appluad your bravery and courage for standing out and be what you are. You are a Great teacher and if you are dismissed , it will be at MOE loss.
Best of luck
Dear Mr Fong,
Thank you for showing us the right way to lead our lives - by accepting ourselves.
Even though you only taught me for 8 weeks, you have left a deep impression on me. And I have got to say - you are one helluva teacher!
So rock on, Mr Fong! And thank you for inspiring others who are also struggling to accept themselves and their sexuality.
Regards,
Mush (2A ‘07)
[...] original coming out letter can be read here. MOE’s and the school’s response can be found [...]
My response is rather different from most of those I’ve read so far.
I seriously question Otto’s motive for telling the whole world (especially knowing that his students will come to know about it) about his being a gay. My point is that as a teacher, he is definitely imparting values beyond what he teaches academically. I don’t think one can separate the values that a teacher observes (in this case, expounds publicly) from the content of his teaching.
Is he encouraging RI students to experiment with homosexuality? I believe that many gays started out when someone older approaches them and manages to persuade them that it is ok to experiment with their sexuality. With blogs like Otto’s, these teenagers would be much more easily “persuaded”.
If an adult wants to be a gay, then I would say that they are making a choice as a mature person. But to impart such values to impressionable teens (especially by a teacher), then I say that is stepping out of line.
[...] it is this issue of prejudice which Otto Fong’s letter deals with. Prejudice against a fellow human being. The ruthless dehumanising of a fellow human [...]
I agree with Ponder that if Mr Fong encourages the students to experiment with homosexuality then Ponder is right. If Mr Fong does not encourage them, but tells them hey, if you are homosexual and needs counselling in this area, and is depressed and wants to commit suicide, Mr Fong is here to talk to you about it. So I guess, Ponder, we do not know unless we are his students.
According to Dr Vivian Balakrishnan, most blogs have a readership of one. These are truly online diaries that have no repurcussions whatsover on the rest of the nation.
But when a personal blog becomes popular suddenly, we cannot ignore its effects on the rest of the nation.
Mr Fong is proudly declaring he is a homosexual. I have nothing against that. But I wonder the effects of his actions on the rest of our nation.
Will Mr Fong inadvertently start a movement? Of people confessing all kinds of tendencies and fetishes to the rest of the country? If that is so, so what?
If our society can tolerate such tendencies, then there wouldn’t have been any problems to begin with. But is our society generally receptive? Should we force our opinions and tendencies down their throats and disregard their wishes?
Let’s say I have a fetish for animal sex. Does that mean no one should deny me the right to talk about it in public or to even promote it?
What if love to go nude? Can I just strip myself bare and sunbathe at Raffles Place and then blog about it? Do I not consider that some lady might find my nakedness offensive? Does it not constitute outraging of modesty?
What if I love drugs? Why can’t I say I love to do drugs? Why deny me drugs in the first place?
I love guns and love carrying them around and I want to tell the world it’s perfectly alright to carry a gun around. Why the nationwide manhunt for the NS men with the rifle then?
Should we as a responsible member of this society, do whatever we like and say whatever we like, in the name of personal liberty, without ever considering the effects of our actions on others?
Truly Singapore,
Society bases its idea of right or wrong on moral precepts at a given point in time. Morality is like a moveable feast - it changes as society changes.
The same arguments you are making were the same ones made in the past - such as those concerning equal rights for blacks, slavery, women’s rights and so on.
The arguments borders on taking the extreme scenarios. Just as some christians are saying that gay people want to, basically, annihilate churches.
In my opinion, nothing is better than allowing and legalising homosexuality in order to see if what is feared is justified. Short of that, we are all speculating - some taking extreme views, others more moderate.
Otto, having been a teacher for 8 years (?) has, by all accounts, been an excellent teacher. I am not persuaded by arguments that just because he has now declared his sexuality that he will suddenly turn into some sort of mental, raving, militant loony out to brainwash young minds and turn them into homosexuals.
As for sex with animals (bestiality), nudist tendencies and what not, I think they are extreme examples you are giving. Still, if society is able to accept that, then it will be accepted - however abhorrent you may think it is now.
Just as when people thought blacks having equal rights were abhorrent, or women having rights, or slaves being free.
Or abortion being made legal. In Singapore.
Measure a man by his contribution to society, if you must. Don’t measure him by what you think he is going to do.
Simply because he hasn’t done it yet - if indeed he is ever going to do it, whatever “it” is.
Innocent til proven guilty.
to Trulysingapore,
I find heterosex offensive. Since your actions are offensive to me (I’m assuming that you’re straight by the way you write), maybe you should stop promoting it to the rest of the world? Get a divorce if you’re married; stop seeing your girlfriend if you’re attached etc…
Such a ill-conceived argument masquerading as truth… sigh… And btw, if you want to hit back with the “majority” argument, think first of the government’s push for the Casinos even though a large majority of Singaporeans would probably publicly decry gambling as a vice not to be encouraged.
The difference between homosexuality and pedophilia and gun-carrying is rather apparent, isn’t it? In the former case, no one gets hurt; not so in the latter cases.
to Ponder,
Please stop kidding yourself about teens being “impressionable”, much less RI kids. This is the internet-age; people will find out what they want to know, information about homosexuality notwithstanding.
and finally, to Ottofong,
I admire and applaud your courage in deciding to come out as a proud gay man; for it is nothing less than commendable to be so well-adjusted in our rather bigoted society. I too, await the day when I can be comfortable enough to be out and proud; until then, do know that your letter has made a difference to this person in his search of himself. my only regret after reading your letter is that i left the gates of RI 2-3 years too early to know you.
Hope for a Better Age,
beAr
TrulySingapore, I would be delighted if Otto Fong succeeded in opening up the Singaporean society on all those issues you talk about by sticking to his guns. Public debate for any issue should always be encouraged.
We may even laud him one day for being kickstarting equal treatment between sexual orientations - the way Rosa Parks is remembered for breaking the law by simply not getting up from her seat in a bus.
I hope that he sticks to his guns and takes the MOE to court - and get MM Lee, who said that gays are simply born that way, as his star defence witness.
dear sir,
i was your student in lower-sec for 2 years .1-2A was a fun-filled class partly because of you.Don’t be to caught up with what other people think of you .Just know that your students, will always remember you as the cool science teacher who drew comics and told witty jokes, never failing to brighten up our day.Honestly, I kinda miss those days in the junior block.I really hope your passion for teaching is still as strong as before.You really do make a difference to the lives of your students.I can safely say that my interest in physics was planted since my lower secondary days.Your zeal and charisma in teaching science definitely helped me to find this passion within myself.For that , I thank you …
Hope to see you soon sir, please stick around longer next teacher’s day!
I have nothing for you…. except my respect!
Great letter. I love the section on “I don’t want to be a bonsai tree”!
[...] 8 September, a school teacher from the bestest best school in Singapore wrote an open letter, revealing his homosexuality to all, on his personal blog. Our Riuva readers here from the more [...]
[...] real police random: no paper tml, hooray. but i’m already dead for the nxt few papers. read: Otto Fong’s Open Letter lesson: to bring panadol to maths [...]
Hey Otto,
Think this is a very brave and important action…. you have my admiration
Heng Leun
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To: BeAr
This being the internet age is precisely why I am concerned that a teacher is encouraging a gay lifestyle. Yes some teenagers will learn about homosexuality from the internet, but to have a “respectable” teacher to nudge them along ?
Ponder,
Is he encouraging his students to turn homosexual, or sending a message to those who are confused that they have someone to talk to and come to some closure over whether they might be or might not be homosexual.
The latter is probably the role he did play.
Furthermore, having a role model does help homosexual adolescents traverse this rocky period in their lives.
There are some people who think that homosexuality is wrong. I don’t understand the way they think.
If you rob a bank, it is wrong because you take money that isn’t yours and you deprive people of it. Murder is wrong because you’re depriving people of life. Hitting people is wrong because you hurt them.
In what way are people harmed by homosexuals? Some people are saying that it’s wrong because it’s obscene. But heterosexual people are equally capable of obscene acts. Then some people are saying that it’s wrong because you might corrupt youngsters. If there is nothing wrong about homosexual behaviour then why is it corrupting youngsters?
The only reason why it’s wrong is because people say that it’s wrong. And to say that it’s right is like saying all those people who thought that it is wrong in the past are wrong. (Actually they are.) And that is truly unacceptable.
So coming out is just saying, “we should be intolerant of intolerance”. Which is right, that’s the only thing we should be intolerant of.
Ponder doesn’t make any sense at all. Encouraging a homosexual lifestyle?! If we can encourage a homosexual lifestyle, why don’t we encourage a heterosexual lifestyle to the gays? In this way, everyone will be straight.
what do pple mean when they say otto is “encouraging” students to experiment with “gay lifestyle”????
i don’t remember “experimenting” with “hetero lifestyle” in my school days and i turned out hetero. if anything, i was in a single sex sec school and was very much aware of some surrounding students “liking” other students - in a christian school and without any “encouragement” from gays.
the fact is, if you’re attracted to a certain sex, you just are. kindly don’t impose your value on the others. the world can certainly do with less bigotry and hatred.
To Pui Yee,
You brought up a good point. You were in a girl school and noticed that there were girl/girl relationships in the school without encouragement from gays. And you turned out hereto.
Question is would the situation be different if your school had several teachers (popular ones, highly respected) who are openly lesbians. Brought their partners to school functions and so on.
Don’t you think that would have a strong influence on how some of the students of your school would turn out with regard to their sexuality?
It may not have affected you, but can you say the same for your fellow schoolmates. Especially those who have a passing crush on another girl - who are then “encouraged” (by how their esteemed teachers behave) to decide that they are not hetero.
Apart from parents, the other adults who have pretty strong influence over teens are teachers, don’t you agree?
Well then, Ponder,
Instead of wasting so much time trying to convince us that Mr Fong is encouraging RI students to be gay, why not spend your precious time more constructively and offer some solutions for gay teenagers who have no one to turn to for guidance and counselling? You are entitled to your opinion, and so are the rest of us, this highly fallacious argument will only go nowhere and result in frustration on both sides.
On a sidenote, I hail from a single sex school as well and we openly discuss lesbianism, and we even know who is lesbian and who isn’t. Or bisexual, for that matter. But it doesn’t matter, really. By the way I highly doubt that sexual tendencies can be encouraged.
Fong ftw.
I don’t like people talking about whether gays coming out can influence other people to experiment in homosexual behaviour. The answer is pretty obvious: yes it can. More people will be coming out. Once people think it’s acceptable there will be more gay people around. More people will experiment and they may or may not revert to heterosexual behaviour. It was acceptable in ancient Greece and so many of them had gay lovers.
The real problem is the notion that there is something wrong with homosexual behaviour.
My question to ponder: just explain in plain English, as best you can, tell me why you think homosexual behaviour is “wrong”. Give me a reason that doesn’t sound irrational.
Here is an example if you’re confused: guns are wrong because they hurt people. Drugs are wrong because they ruin your health and addiction drives people to a life of crime. So just complete the sentence: “homosexuality is wrong because…”
“homosexuality is wrong because…”
“you cannot procreate naturally”
To Ponder,
And so? If you were originally heterosexual, would you bother changing to become homosexual through the influence of someone else? If people start changing their own sexual orientation, it would be near entirely their own preferences, would it not? Hence, if they were to change to being homosexual, it is still not forced on to them. References to homosexual people are also not too uncommon these days. All this particular teacher is doing, is not hiding the fact that he is homosexual. I fail to see how would this directly cause anyone else to suddenly change.
Also, how would the students’ choice of sexuality affect anyone else negatively? If students were to realise that they are more comfortable with being homosexual, to disagree with their own personal opinion would simply be discriminating against homosexuality in general, wouldn’t it?
to ponder, if my school had openly gay teachers who were popular, it would definitely encourage gay students (or students who think they were) to out. so??? these same students would have the same feelings of attraction towards the same sex regardless of the presence or absence of role models.
with both hetero and gay role models around, these students can then be properly counselled to better understand their true sexuality.
what you would like to see is the repression of gay feelings in school because of your dispproval of homosexuality. think about that.
to steven, “cannot procreate naturally” means it is wrong? wahahahah…zzzzzz…
I believe that piece of meat is made with a certain function in mind and that orifice behind it as well.
“A bonsai tree is an imitation of a real tree. It is kept in a small pot with limited nutrients, trimmed constantly to fit someone else’s whim.”
So dear Otto, why did you really take down your blog? Did someone trim your bonsai tree?
“cannot procreate naturally” is wrong?
What about couples who are unfortunate not to be able to bear their own children? What about couples who underwent artificial insemination or IVF? What about couples who adopt?
Lets all tell them that they are wrong because they “cannot procreate naturally”.
i never said they are ‘right’
they are either medically ‘wrong’ or don’t need a child or don’t want to put the effort to concieve on their own.
Dear Steven,
You cannot seriously believe what you just posted right?
So lets eliminate everyone who is “medically wrong” then. The crippled, the blind, the disabled…. (need I go on?). Lets eliminate anyone who don’t want to put an effort to do anything too!
Either we are still in the dark ages or Hitler is still alive!
neither. People are asking me what is wrong with homosexuals, I am merely replying to that sentence. I’m not eliminating anyone with my statement. I have no power to eliminate them even if I wanted to. Hitler? Dark Ages? These guys are in the past and have nothing to do with what we’re talking about.
People want to equate homosexuals with people who cannot concieve naturally because of their health? That is something I want to question. I don’t want to use the word gay here but homosexual is a bit of a fistful to type
Is it disease of the mind, or genetics that makes the mind think their same gender is attractive? That is what I want to know.
IMO, not being able to procreate is a good enough reason not to be homosexual.
“what you would like to see is the repression of gay feelings in school because of your dispproval of homosexuality. think about that.”
Pui Yee,
I won’t call it repression. The important point is that homosexuality should not be encouraged in school. And teachers who have the most influence over teenagers, should not be allowed to glamourise homosexuality. And yes, I do believe that teenagers can be coerced to experiment with homosexuality because “it’s ok lah, even my teacher is doing it”.
By the way, if Otto were a teacher in a primary school, would you still feel that what he has done is appropriate ? Just curious.
I would not go that far, Ponder.
It’s a touchy issue, and I believe Mr.Fong is a very brave man for coming out of the closet, I certainly would not do so if I were a teacher. Imagine what the parents would say as well as the school reputation!
I have to get off my workstation now. Cheers.
There is a big misunderstanding that sex is only about procreation. This is wrong. Sex is also about social harmony. Sex keeps a family together. A mother and a father only need to have sex a few times to create a family, but they will have sex hundreds of times. Why? Because it helps them live together. It’s already part of our national values that the family is the building block of society, and sex is an important building block of the family.
It’s not hard to see that gay sex fulfills this function and can help foster stable relationships. It is useful in a way that doesn’t have to do with procreation.
We live in a society, and in our own way we keep humanity going on. It is not necessary that every person has to play his role in reproducing.
Furthermore there are plenty of people who take the vow of celibacy and “cannot procreate naturally”. People who are amahs, priests, nuns, and usually they are held up as bastions of virtue. Are they sinful? Medically unfit?
And what is ponder’s answer to this question?
Ponder said - I believe that many gays started out when someone older approaches them and manages to persuade them that it is ok to experiment with their sexuality.
Is your belief based on your opinion or actual studies?
I have several gay friends and none of them concur with your belief…
Likewise for me (straight guy), I knew from young that I prefer girls and there was no need for an older women to approach me to encourage me to do so…
And this may come as a surprise to you but so did my gay friends…
I am dont really know what to say. I guess the only guy who I can really resonate with as far as this subject is concerned is that Dr Darkness from the Brotherhood Press abt this whole matter. The words he used, I believe is, forgive me, if I dont join the bandwagon…..
He just makes it all look so simple and complicated at the same time so accurately. I think that’s really how it is to most of us, although admitting it is a different matter.
Good Luck Otto and Best Wishes.
Otto,
We were in the same year at TTC, there are at least over 20 of us rooting for you. Hang on there buddy, be strong and I hope it all turns out cherry.
Say hello to D for me. Bye
Hi all,
Gayism ISN’T something normal. It is made for opposite forces of magnets to attract, and hence, this would be a clarification I would make. Apart from the many confessions of people who are gay coming here, for example, the person MUSH from 2A and more, I would like to say, gayism doesn’t make more people like you. Perhaps only gays would. YES, just stick with tradition k? I know Mr. Fong is saying something truthful, he is in no wrong. But all the other gays who think you can just do another confession here, please stop it. THANK YOU:D
anonymous
Dear Sir,
I am a student in RI and I support what you said. I believe that whether you are gay or not would not make a difference (to me at least), as judging a person requires many other aspects and this is but one. Plus, I have nothing against gays. Personally, I think that you are a great person, cheerful and brave, even though I am not your student. I would just like to say that I support gay rights and believe that they are in no way different from the other sexes. It may even be a third and accepted gender in the future to come.
The trend in all the world is one of that that is moving towards supporting gay rights and gay marriages. It is only a matter of time that Singapore does so too. The very presence of your article, stirring up this great controversy, could be the very thing that speeds Singapore up on the way to the inevitable, and save precious time. Therefore I applaud you for your undeniable courage.
Sec 2 student in RI
The Subject of Homosexuality broached by the many bloggers lately has got so much unneccessary arguments. It is a waste of time and space and causing much frictions, can it not be left to every man(kind) him/herself to do what he/she likes and be answerable when he/she faces question and problem themselves? Sex apparently gets many interested in the Subject as it is an inbuilt nature to all living things. However, as in any deed of humans, there got to be a sense of proportion. There were many very good arguments from both sides which mean that each has got his/her reason to be what they are. So why not let it be and keep it to yourself, why argue with others about who you are? If you are challenged by anyone over your sexuality, challenge the other party directly, there is no need for publicity for the matter, Regards.
I ain’t just anybody:D Says:
September 12th, 2007 at 4:53 pm
Hi all,
Gayism ISN’T something normal. It is made for opposite forces of magnets to attract, and hence, this would be a clarification I would make. Apart from the many confessions of people who are gay coming here, for example, the person MUSH from 2A and more, I would like to say, gayism doesn’t make more people like you. Perhaps only gays would. YES, just stick with tradition k? I know Mr. Fong is saying something truthful, he is in no wrong. But all the other gays who think you can just do another confession here, please stop it. THANK YOU:D
anonymous
hello this person here. i’d just like to say that u cant just keep ostracizing ppl like this. just bcos one is a student and one is a teacher doesnt make so much difference. they’re both gays. gays are normal, u just got to accept it. pls dont make personal assaults. why shouldn’t they make their confessions?
u might find gayness abnormal and all, but who knows how humanity’s mindset would be in 20 yrs. half a century ago, a woman coming out to work would be highly unacceptable, but now it’s a commonly accepted fact.
i think we should try to get the govt. (or at least the general public) to accept gayness and approach it with an open and mature mindset. this is a global trend and will happen to singapore sooner or later, so why not speed up the process and not waste time?
referring to scb’s comments, i feel that there is a need for publicity. the way i see, the majority of the general public do not accept gayness. so there is a need to actually speak out against this general population. just going against the singular person who challenges the gay’s sexuality is not going to be of much help at all. it’s the broad, general public! because of this, there needs to be a voicing out to instigate a larger discussion so as to further perpetrate this issue that has been so distastefully disregarded for a long time. only when ppl start talking abt it can there be hope for any change in the current situation.
[...] words are my own comments.] AN OPEN LETTER FROM OTTO FONG (taken from theonlinecitizen) I am Otto Fong. I have been teaching Science in Raffles Institution for the last eight [...]
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