Tng Ying Hui
Recently the internet has been abuzz with news of a scantily clad woman who was molested at Sentosa Siloso beach party by four men. Bystanders, instead of taking action whipped out their phones for an exciting scoop (Read more here), mistaking such pejoration for a vignette. There has been speculation that the ‘woman’ in question was in fact, a transvestite, but this would be to gloss over the real story.
First truth : Video voyeurism
The truth is that we are increasingly obsessed with digital media. The hours spent on internet increases drastically with each generation, with online social networking through Youtube(ing) and Facebook(ing) becoming part and parcel of our lives. These habits are supplemented by our increasingly sophisticated handphones, which unfortunately have also been increasingly abused to exploit the vulnerability of others. Perhaps it is time to pause and reflect on the decadence that has plagued our society.
Addiction to video voyeurism masquerading as affirmative “citizen journalism” is a reflection of a distasteful social psyche. Our privacy, once sacred, now trembles on the precipice. Guard the new age weapon – camera phones! Erratically alive with a variety of clips, the internet has become a platform to upload anything of interest to us, but we abuse it by neglecting the feelings of those involved in the clip. We should be prudent in our decisions, bearing in mind the decency and privacy of the subjects of our impromptu videos before we unveil them for all to see on the internet.
An unwise decision could outrage another person’s fundamental right to privacy. Citizen journalism in Singapore plays an extremely important role by expanding our civic space, especially since the mainstream media and the government are engaged in a dysfunctional embrace that has stifled freedom of expression. Being a journalist is about doing Journalism, but mere voyeurism will only stultify the maturation of real journalism.
Through such instances of video voyeurism, it is revealing that our right to privacy has been increasingly infringed upon and respect trespassed. Technology advances were meant to increase the convenience of our lives, but instead we suffer from the inconveniences when it is abused.
Second Truth: Victims are not culpable
In this particular case, outrageously unwarranted attention has been on the woman. Party goers have claimed that the woman was a willing party; she had no modesty and so this case cannot be considered an outrage of modesty.
Regardless of what really ensued, the comments made by interviewees (before the rumour that she is actually a transvestite circulated), such as “She deserved it”, “It’s normal”, have reflected the worst of Singapore youths. (I breathed a sigh of relief when there was one guy who commented: “It’s disgusting”). Hefty censorship by Razor TV cannot be neglected. By editing the video favourable to them, they are able to elicit certain impact, making it newsworthy. But regardless, the words were not a fig of anyone’s imagination, they were real.
From the comments, it implied that despite her vulnerability having been exploited, she was deemed culpable as a victim. I am not contending that her decision to dress skimpily was wise, but the focus of attention should have been on the men who groped her, the lack of respect and dignity from those who choose to engage in video voyeurism and those who blamed her entirely for the unfortunate incident.
Her situation as a victim has been consigned to oblivion. By casting moral judgements on her, we are condoning molestation as the norm and implying that she ought to be blamed for unheeding it. But as Mathia Lee, social activist says, “The responsibility is not the victim’s to bear, because it is a basic human right to have a safe public environment. It is the responsibility of the state to ensure the environment is safe.”
We all remember Tammy. Tammy from Nanyang Polytechnic, whose video of her boyfriend and her having sex was leaked, when her hand phone was stolen. It created such uproar, with unrelenting debates on pre-marital sex, but nothing much was said of the person who leaked the video. She was blameless, despite trampling on another’s privacy. The colloquial name conferred – “Tammy’s sex video” left her in the spotlight, alone, her other half blameless and nameless. We all remember Tammy’s act, but not her psychological state in the aftermath. What has happened to her? Do we even care?
Third Truth: Patriarchy perpetuated
This patriarchal society has percolated a mindset somewhat demeaning towards women, something which has seeped subtly into our consciousness. Nonchalance towards instances of molest in the clubs, by sadly relegating such instances as the norm, suggests a deeper problem of unbalanced power between the male and female entrenched within society.
To focus a large amount of attention on the female club goers, construing them to stereotypes, would only further augment and canonize the power of the male. We are entrapped in the mindset that males should be given some slack as they have higher incidences of molesting, but the females are at fault for disregarding that “social norm”. Have we forgotten that as human beings we should always treat each other with dignity and respect? Meaning, in no circumstances should either gender be overstepping boundaries that make another uncomfortable.
The environment of a club – alcohol, raging hormones, and suggestive signals – presents a complex issue here. But if we could treat one another as human beings, to love and respect, we will go the extent to prevent ourselves from denying someone else that. If there is even a slight possibility, that we may commit a mistake, should we not truncate all chances of that occurrence? And the fact that under the influence of alcohol our inhibitions are lessened is not an excuse for “mistakes”, but rather, to be more intentional in ensuring respect for oneself and others.
Patriarchy has been perpetuated because we accept certain stereotypes about woman, and disrespectful behaviours of men towards woman as the “norm”. But when all abide by the most important norm – respect – social ills such as video voyeurism and unequal power between males and females will see a decline, achieving a mature society.
“Men are respectable only as they respect”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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- Care about AWARE: Leaders we respect
- Religion and the right not to respect it
- Partnership, trust, respect needed for stability
- Singaporeans have no self-respect, says Jackie Chan
- We should respect MM Lee, but not defer to him
the four look like tourist type likely out of the country by now and escape punishment.
The guys and the girl look like foreign talent. They are here to increase the population.
What to do, it has happened. Singapore is a very happening place.
Maybe TOC should also broadcast videos that attract a lot of potential viewers like videos that show a singaporean male having a lot of sex with many sexual partners ? Or maybe how foreigners grope that fair looking lady , with both hands?
Will shavor tv do this?
Like this is it the only way to engage the young minds?
’shavor’ i wonder what they trying to cut?
Regardless if the girl asked for it or not, MOLEST is MOLEST.
I felt nauseaus when the society commented that ’she deserved it’. Reminds me of the usa movie where a woman was GANG RAPED in a pub on a pool table by sort of like biker gang or beer addicts.
She may wear attractively. This is legal. She did not seem like feeling comfortable when being “dehn’g” by foreign hands. I see that she wanted to get away but was like maybe too drunk or intoxicated to know what to do. Maybe she was numbed, in more places than 1?
Anyways, such acts must not be encouraged . When people say, ’she asked for it’, it is like allowing or even in certain extent saying that what the men did is acceptable and legal. Would this not give pub goers more confidence to try groping women’s breasts and test water?
The lady may not have made police report. But why did the police not question the indian-lookalikes given that the whole internet has seen the video and photo evidence? Like this is the act recorded as a crime statistic? I think not.
Regardless, breast groping is wrong especially when done in public. young children may be learning too much from these immoral persons.
How many like that?
I had several similar type of colleagues who are young and away from home. another colleague asked them, you here so long, what happens when you feel the ‘urge’ ? They were pissed or embarrassed. So, they asked me bring them to Geylang. They preferred those from china, coincidentally. The other had more exotic one.
So, while we need to spare a thought for young male foreigner workers their urging needs, its wrong to get free gropes of the woman’s breasts, especially doing it in public like enjoying a free buffet and when the woman LOOKED too INTOXICATED to react or defend herself.
Women beware. Are you now AWARE?
I felt strange that shavor tv showed many interview comments which suggest she asked for it. What about interview comments that condem the act? Yes, there is 1 or 2 or several such comments but i saw many comments that condemned the girl rather than the molesters.
WHY?
Why did ST not report the type of person these were?
Why did ST not report what type of lady was groped?
Why did ST not show picture ?
For this news , i was glad i did not pay a cent to read the newspaper and had the internet resources to view all the videos and pictures, FOR FREE.
I don’t buy the news because….. i get to read for free legally. Why pay when its legal to read for free?
To those who said she asked for it or deserved it.
Let me ask you what i am confident will Choke you and make you feel like want to take back your words .
1. Would you say the same IF your girlfriend or sister or friend or … was the person instead? Everyone on earth knows you you will not say the same thing. Double standard? pui!
Come, reply. hahahaha. I make you eat your words.
I realise that singapore is the only place in the world where, when something bad happens to you, you will not get sympathy from friends or bystanders. Even for the worst cases like this, the usual response is ‘it’s your fault for getting into this mess’, ‘you didn’t take precautions so you’re to blame’. It makes me sick. I had several good friends who stopped talking to me the moment I ran into trouble. I didn’t even ask them for anything, just a listening ear. But even for that, they decided i had become a waste of time. The PAP’s worldview has long seeped into the psyche of society.
Ying Hui,
On your point about patriarchy. I think it is a non-starter.
1. The issue is about molest – a crime.
2. It is also about the nonchalant attitude of the public (no one assisted her).
3. It is s also about the sick guy who recorded it and bothered to post it.
I am not going into details of each, especially #1, which has been debated in other places that it might have been consensual. I would like to discuss on your point on patriarchy.
I sense that whenever there are gender issues, some women would take the opportunity to bring up this patriarchal society stuff. The case can draw sympathy on the argument of molest alone. It can draw further sympathy from the fact that no one helped her (or him?). But the moment you argue the patriarchal case, you dilute the seriousness of the crime and sympathy you have gathered.
Are you trying to imply that patriarchal system encourages crimes like molest? That it encourages sick voyeurism and nonchalance from the public to help a damsel (or transsexual) in distress?
See the turn of focus that would detract from the victim of molest, to the point that society must not endorse patriarchal system? Are we going to talk about why patriarchy is good or bad, and dilute the issue of the molested victim?
It is also interesting to note that while you are against stereotyping victim as culpable, you implied that patriarchy is contributory. Why can’t you and the others (whom you ticked off for implying victim culpability), just admit the REAL TRUTH – the molesters are the real criminals!
Why the need for this blame game, be it victim or patriarchal society?
Hello, what’s the need for this moderation stuff?
I completely agree. Trawling the online forums thesedays, you see youngsters coming up with now-cliched anti-establishment remarks, thinking that just by being different, by being sensationalist, they’re fashionable or ‘cool’.
To some extent, I blame western civilization for glorifying the constant anti-cultural endeavours of their youngsters – by advocating that just by being different, you’re trendy and hence admired. Being different doesn’t mean being an A**hole; and if that’s the only way they can think of, they’re complete dotards.
One CAN be different and unique and still have a conscience. Thesedays, I find that the people who are truly admired are the principled, ethical and thoughtful youngsters who are actually unique without submitting/surrendering to the peer pressure to be “cynically unique”. For goodness’ sake, some of those guys are 14 – 15! You haven’t experienced enough in life to even touch cynicism, so stop pretending to be!
I despair at the internet age youth… and yes, to a certain extent, I blame the PAP for that as well.
I agree with #7.
There’s false psyche that “ALL” choices are laid out there and there’s actually no victim but fault of the “victim” themselves – destitute (why not working?!), can’t afford shelter (can get govt loan/assistance what!), can’t find job (SPUR, upgrade, retrain or is it cos you’re too fussy?), underemployed (retrain again!), retrenched (retrain, change industry!), molested (u asked for it by dressing so), cheated of money or mis-sold (cos u too greedy!)… and the list goes on…
Comment number 7 sums up our harsh reality.
I feel sad about the way singaporeans are nurtured or influenced to be so cold hearted. But when their loved ones becomes the victim that is when they will wake up. There is no other way.
well, when the floodgates are that open to foreigners S’pore become less Asian, more rojak.
our locals gals may well be the helpless victims for future countdown parties, can trust police to arrest foreigners (especially angmohs) if he or worse they grope our women, children, girlfriend, family members…?
is this the “spice” someone said foreigners are?
In the words of Chow Yuen Fatt in
Pirates of the Carribean…
Welcome to Singapore.
@Pinkie hiding scared shitless, if that was my gf/wife i would say that she deserved it.
she could have gotten off the stage immediately. from the video, she looked more like she was shy getting groped openly in front of the people rather than a helpless victim. she was still trying to dance up there on the stage.
anyway, lots of girls like that in clubs =)