The following is a speech by AWARE Executive Director Corinna Lim at AWARE’s Sexual Assault Befrienders Service launch on 25th November 2011.
Our Guest of Honour, Minister of Foreign Affairs and Law, Mr Shanmugam, members of the press, friends of AWARE:
Good morning everyone.
Mr Shanmugam, thank you for supporting the launch of the Sexual Assault Befrienders Service today. We know you have a very busy schedule and we are really glad that the Government is taking the issue of sexual assault seriously. It is a much overlooked area which requires some attention.
Being sexually assaulted is a terrifying experience for a woman whatever her level of sexual experience. The aftermath can be almost as traumatic, if one has to go through this alone.
I would like to quote the experience of a woman who has given us permission to share her story. She was a tourist outside Singapore when the incident happened . She came to see us for advice on how she could seek justice . We put her in touch with lawyers in the country where it happened and this started a chain of events which eventually led to the capture of a serial rapist:
“What I found most challenging after the assault, was the fact that exactly when you are most impacted and impaired by the incident, you have to go through further invasions which involve making crucial and far-reaching decisions. You have to get medical treatment for the injuries, address the risk of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, decide if you want to report the incident to the police and, if you wish to proceed with police action, you have to get the DNA samples from your private parts. And ideally, all of this should happen as soon as possible and no later than 72 hours after the incident.”
Women have called the AWARE helpline 5 years, 10 years and even 16 years, after they were sexual assaulted, to talk about what happened. Time did not heal their wounds. They were still suffering from panic attacks, flashblacks and nightmares. And some were depressed. Sometimes their partners or boyfriends, desperate to find a solution, called us for help.
These Helpline cases indicated to us that many victims did not have the support they needed after the assault to find closure and to move on.
It is these very cold calls – in rape vocabulary, anything beyond the first 72 hours is considered cold – that prompted us to create the Sexual Assault Befriender Service – a specialized, comprehensive support service for sexual assault survivors.
In May this year, we launched the Sexual Assault Befriender Service or SABS (for short).
What is SABS?
SABs comprises a dedicated Helpline, counselling, legal counselling and Befriending services.
These are all services that we offer for other types of cases. However, the SABS Helpline runs from 10 am to 9.30 pm, longer hours than our regular Helpline which operates from 3 pm to 930 pm.
SABS clients get to see our legal counsellor within three days (depending on the urgency) instead of waiting 2 weeks for our Legal Clinic.
We can send a SABS Befriender down to the police station almost immediately, if necessary.
Also, we follow up with the client a lot more actively, keeping in touch with them to see how they are doing and following up on their police case.
SABS Pilot
To carry out the SABS pilot, we equipped 7 Befrienders and 4 counsellors with specialized information and skills to provide support for sexual assault victims. These were people who had already gone through Helpline training or were professional counsellors. So, they had a basic background in providing emotional support.
We also set up a new section of resources on our website, where we offer the most comprehensive information available on rape in Singapore.
The objectives of the pilot were:
To assess the demand for such a service
To assess what we might need to roll out the service fully
To develop our experience working with sexual assault victims, supporting them through the medico-legal processes
To find out what issues might arise in providing this service.
We did not publicise this service in the media. We announced it on our website and to our database.
The results of the pilot told us there is a real need for SABS.
Demand
During the six-month pilot, we received 24 calls about sexual abuse cases i.e. rape, molest, extortion. This is roughly double the number of sexual abuse calls that we usually receive on our regular Helpline over a six-month period.
Of the 24 calls received, 14 were rape cases.
We met with 10 of the 24 callers and provided them with counselling, befriending and/or legal counselling services.
So, yes, there was a demand in terms of numbers.
More importantly, there was a demand in terms of the amount of help needed for each case. The demand on our team was much more intense than what is required in supporting non-SABS cases.
Some clients came in twice a week to see our counsellor.
Legal counselling usually took 1.5 hours instead of 30 minutes. Befriending would typically take 3 – 5 hours per visit.
So, it is a lot of hours of support for one person. But if this is what it takes to help a sexual assault survivor to heal and recover rather than to go through years or a lifetime of self-blame, fear, anxiety, self-abuse and depression, it is more than worth it.
What we need to roll out
A new counselling room, given the number of contact hours. We will be renovating our back room for this purpose.
An additional social worker to manage this service.
A dedicated SABS number.
More volunteers to be trained as Befrienders.
Outreach and publicity, mainly through working with partners. We hope to partner with the Police and hospitals in particular, to reach out to “hot” cases (cases in the first 72 hours).
We need to get the word out in the media, the Internet, to other VWOs and to the public in general that there is now a specialized service for this.
We need money to fund all this. We would like to thank the Margaret Mary Wearnes Charitable Trust and the Chen Su Lan Trust for ensuring that we have funding to provide this service for a year. But of course, we need more money for longer sustainability.
Issues
I would like to talk briefly about three things:
Date rape
Most rape is acquaintance rape, and more often than not it is date rape. To give you an idea – of the 34 rape calls that we received on our Helpline over the past two years, where information about the relationship between the perpetrator and the victim was made available to us, there was only 1 case in which the woman was raped by a stranger. In all the other cases, the rapists were people the victims knew.
Date rape is especially confusing for the victim as there is some level of consent to the situation and there is often an issue of evidence.
Even though the victim did not consent to the sexual penetration, she may have consented to meeting the accused at a late hour alone, to drinking and often to a certain degree of intimacy with the perpetrator, short of sexual intercourse. Although she is clear that she did not consent to sex, she feels partly responsible for the situation.
In date rape cases, we will provide the victim with information as to how the law defines rape and consent. We will support her to deal with feelings of guilt and shame, and sometimes, the adverse judgments of her family and friends.
Our role as Helpliners, Befrienders and Counsellors in the case of a date rape is to be empathetic and supportive.
We say “It’s not your fault” and we work from there.
As a Befriender, I have seen with my own eyes the difference these words “It’s not your fault” make to a sexual assault survivor. They can be life-saving.
Police procedures
The Police are generally the first point of contact for sexual assault victims. In Singapore, a rape victim will have to
make a police report before she can get a Rape Kit done at the hospital. A Rape Kit is the collection of DNA samples for forensic testing.
When the victim first goes to the Police station, she is usually in a state of trauma and confusion. The Police thus have an extremely challenging role as they have to take a report on highly sensitive and personal matters from victims when they are at their most distressed.
A negative experience at this critical stage may re-traumatize the victim and/or deter the victim from proceeding with the report or the prosecution.
This is where the Befriender can be of enormous help to the victim and the Police. Based on our experience of working with sexual assault victims, we believe that our Befrienders’ support of the victims will assist the Police in carrying out their investigative roles more effectively while, at the same time, ensure that the victim receives the emotional support that she needs during this time.
The Police have to be impartial fact finders. They cannot be the people to tell the victim “It’s not your fault”. But the victim is at a stage where she really needs to be believed and supported, and our Befriender can play this role.
The Minister has kindly facilitated a meeting between AWARE and the Police to discuss this next month and we sincerely hope that we will be able to work out an arrangement with the Police whereby we can be there to support the victims from the time they make the police report.
The low rate of reporting
Of the 24 calls that came in during the SABS pilot period, only 6 victims had made police reports.
This is not surprising. It stems from a few factors. In the case of date rape, victims are not sure if a crime has taken place, are afraid of not being believed, feel that they have no evidence or are too ashamed to bring it up.
Victims may also be fearful of victim-blaming – factors such as how they dressed and behaved and their past sexual history may be used against them.
When we started to research rape laws and procedures, we came across Section 157(d) of the Evidence Act, which allows a woman’s past ‘immoral’ history to be used against her. The law had in fact codified victim blaming.
We approached the Minister about this and I am happy to say that he will be announcing some good news about this issue a little later.
We are most heartened by how open and responsive the Government has been to our feedback in this area. We look forward to a closer engagement between civil society and the government.
I will end with another quote from the same survivor that I quoted before:
She says:
“ I did not have the knowledge, experience, or -after what had happened- the self-assurance to proceed but the fact that I did, with the emotional and professional support of AWARE, is the very reason that today I can face life at eye level again. ……Considering the shame, humiliation and helplessness that the victims often experience, I think it is important to look at SABS not as a charitable service but as a necessary institution that can make all the difference when it matters most.”
So, this is the start of a long process. AWARE celebrates its 26th birthday today. We have with us our past presidents, Constance Singam and Dana Lam, and founding member, Margaret Thomas, to share this special day. We are also joined by some members of the SABS team and many other committed volunteers who have contributed their talents and time to AWARE.
We hope to be around for another 26 years, and then some. For the immediate future, our aim is to make sure that survivors of sexual assault know that they can turn to SABS for immediate help and support, and do not have to struggle alone with their pain for months or years.
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Rape is a subject most people would not like to talk about. This natural reluctance to eschew discussion has led to some misconceptions about rape. It had become almost a taboo. Secrecy, silence and shame may have contributed to the lack of understanding and awareness about the causes and effects of rape. Teenagers and young women need to know as they form the majority of victims.
Thanks to AWARE in initiating SABS, more help can be rendered to victims in healing and moving on with their lives.
@ Titiana Ann Xavier
So is it Yes or No? :)
Prevention is better than cure.SABS is only beneficial to some victims after the happening.
It will be more sincere if one can launch something to educate women on how they should take safety precaution and the way they dressed up..
Avoid meeting stranger alone at the hotel or going to the hotel.Many times women had themselves to blame.They may say no,but actually they mean yes.
That is why cases reported is low compared to cases happened.
Meet guys from chatline,internet alone at late hours, keep claiming neglected by husband but spent their time in karaoke etc…these are all hints to men.
So before saying “Its not your fault”,we should remind them.,”Be careful when meeting man alone “
The WORST THING about rape is REMEMBERING RAPE – after the fact of event – not the event itself. It is begone “history” for the rape victim. They don’t want to “re-live” that trauma.
Don’t believe me? Just get the names of ALL (not just a “boisterous” self-selct sample) those “rape victims” from any rape crisis centres or police and invite them to a all-women focus group interview conducted by pyschologists, social workers and medical professionals and then ask them this simple question.
DO YOU KNOW OF ANYBODY WHO HAS BEEN RAPED OR HEARD FROM FRIENDS/RELATIVES AWARE OF INCIDENT OF RAPES. ( the intention of this question seeks to probe the prevalence of actual rapes as compared to reported rapes – some are false and vindictive of purpose),??
YOU SHOULD NOT BE SURPRISED THAT NOBODY ADMITTED TO HAVE BEEN RAPED but instead reported that someone else they know or heard of having been raped – when the truth as known to the interviewer is that the subject person had previously reported her own rape.
So this posed the dilemma that all reported rapes ( to feminist organisation or police) are actually rapes or consensual participation or that the victims are too traumatised to go through the proceedings in the court-room of “remembering rape” again.
True rapes are violent physical domination and abuse – most of the others are consensual dressed up as rapes. So the fact remains is that TRUE RAPES ARE NOT REPORTED and “false” rapes get the drama read hoisted up the pedestal by feminists group with agenda.
Rape victims needs all the help they can get from medical services and pyschological counselling to get past their unfortunate attacks beyond prosecuting the offending criminals. Medical professionals are the best source to get advice on evidence preservation ( a lot of victims actually and unfortunately in total confusion washed away the evidence in a shower soon after the event).
True rape victims DON”T GO to feminist organisations for help – the are NOT seeking drama.
People who are involved in victim counselling (even women among them) don’t believe the work of feminist organisation despite all the drama headline reads in the media.
Aware- next time consider approaching the WP instead, sylvia lim is also a lawyer. Your approach will be more encouraging this way, for you will be coming from the perspective of the ‘suppressed ‘ group.You will also be doing a good deed for an even larger group of singaporeans.
Please consider.
AWARE is so obselete and slow to react to the needs of women that even the Brotherhood have been offered a lorry load of money to start a better org to help us women. If you dont believe, you can google about it. The benefactor is a group of very rich women who come from Hong Kong and Indonesia.
I am fine with laws protecting the modesty of female.
But what I am not agreeable are how some female ‘cry wolf’ of being taken advantaged of or raped by someone. Just to take revenge & create a mess of the other party but when exposed that is is a hoax, the female just got off lightly whereas the male can be handcuffed & locked up or jailed for nothing.
Then there are stories of desperate female threaten guy for outrageous of modesty unless the male pay a lump sum money of $3k to $5k to settle the matter on the spot or face police call-up
Seriously, are we talking about SEX or POLITICAL SEX here.
In this digital age and curse of informed literacy, why would any likely offender bother with the risks of law encumbrances when there is unlimited variety available and the wildest exotic range of experiences can be had (along with aids to complement) just a few click of the mouse in cyberpace to find “consensual participation”?
Surely one must have compelling apprehension that the proposed legislative amendment to section 157(d) repeal fails the hypocrisy test of realistic relevance beyond political agenda.
Suddenly criminal law application is no longer based on “proven beyond reasonable doubt” to balance of probabilities in civil proceedings in the falsity told as truth of happenings?.
Who has proof of “fact” that men and not women who demanded more of sexual experiences?
The whole tectonic plate of law has shifted for reason/s of political sex?
@agongkia,
Good is prevention better than cure you suggested. And am sure that some will be helped by such efforts. But facing reality, there will always be those emotional, lacking confidence, curious ones and others keen for new experiences who will fall prey
at the last minute.
And even preyed when in doubt under duress the law may not care. Not care because their precedence is more with stoic evidence than to deal and not to dwell on lengthy subjective matters of the human kind. The law wants closure as early as possible. So, this is where AWARE and thier SABS come as it is neither the nature nor the province of the courts of the law to want to fact find deep in for the truth of what really happened subjective. In short, courts and laws are object and much less so subjective.
Thus dear Miss @OwCee,
Do you have a baggage of sorts I touched on here? Do please contact AWARE for enlightenment, Even if just for looking into their result for believing in sake. Please tell us more of what you said of Brotherhood. being offered is one thing. Being given is another. And using what’s given and putting it to good use is yet another thing. But best is having done good and with experience in keeping continue to doing good in better ways!
AWARE’s ED Corrina Lim rounded up their Mission as:
“We hope to be around for another 26 years, and then some. For the immediate future, our aim is to make sure that survivors of sexual assault know that they can turn to SABS for immediate help and support, and do not have to struggle alone with their pain for months or years.”
Isn’t 26 yrs good enough experience for another and better 26 yrs dear OWCee which in Hokkien/Teochew mean lousy as in “owcee”!
@ Titiana Ann Xavier
Titiana, Rockabyebaby is here… Wow I like his views… Wow wow I like him…
Geraldine Lim,
Rockabyebaby is one rare enlightened male. Can’t blame you for liking him. :)
Excuse me!!!!! What did I say here that deserves BBQ flaming??
All I am saying is, many professional women dont feel AWARE is doing enough to further the whole idea of womanhood in Singapore.
Its an open secret that many of them have approached the Brotherhood to create a support group of sorts.
I believe they were given an extensive tour of their virtual domain and some even bought virtual real estate there.
Why is AWARE suddenly so territorial? If a grp of gals want to help other gals by funding a support group, AWARE should be happy that Singaporean gals have finally come full circle to take ownership of this issue.
Black cat or white, it matters not providing it catches mice.
I also do not see why there is any need to make fun of my moniker. I have been respectful of everyone here. I dont see why others find it so difficult to do the same?
@rockabyebaby
But facing reality, there will always be those emotional, lacking confidence, curious ones and others keen for new experiences who will fall prey
at the last minute…
…………….
Fall prey?These are the groups that need to know how to protect themselves .
Many cases can be avoided if not of these group who gave the opportunity to men.
Crying rape is easy and man, being accused have to go through the agony .Even if acquitted,imagine the question mark on him even after his release.
Worst still,there are also possibility of being wrongfully charged.
I have aunties and taitais,separated or widowed..approaching me instead of Aware,why?Very stressful you know?
So,must teach them on the correct value and how to protect themselves like how they would protect their property.
Unfair to put money on the table and accuse the innocents for theft when others pick up.
I am not referring to those innocent lady joggers who are dragged and rape in the forest.But here again,avoid jogging alone besides bushes.
I like your views like Geraldine and Titiana,but only confuse when they they call you “he”.Maybe I am wrong.
I also like rockabyebaby…And down will fall baby Cradle and ALL.
Hush-a-by baby
On the tree top,
When the wind blows
The cradle will rock.
When the bough breaks,
The cradle will fall,
And down will fall baby Cradle and all.
- The repeal of Section 157(d) of Singapore’s Evidence Act is long overdue. Hong Kong and Malaysia did away with such anachronistic laws in 1976 and 1988 respectively.
While the removal of such biased laws is positive move, it is unlikely to see a significant rise in the number of rape cases reported. The victims are usually too traumatized, too ashamed and fearful to do so. Many victims will choose to suffer in silence.
- Rape is a subject most people would not like to talk about. This natural reluctance to eschew discussion has led to some misconceptions about rape. It had become almost a taboo. Secrecy, silence and shame may have contributed to the lack of understanding and awareness about the causes and effects of rape. Teenagers and young women need to know as they form the majority of victims.
Thanks to AWARE in initiating SABS, more help can be rendered to victims in healing and moving on with their lives.
Where is the contradiction? Come out with your own comments. Don’t just cut and paste. Those are two different issues.
WOW!Titiana Ann Xavier 26 November 2011
Geraldine Lim,
Rockabyebaby is one rare enlightened male. Can’t blame you for liking him. :)
——————
Thank you. As it looks like I gave myself away as a male and an enlightened one too in my last posting as you said.
Cherp cherp cherp! Who shal I then ask for a date? Geraldine or Titiana? Which one of you would like to go out with a baby you may have to rock? ::-)). Just fun pun lah!
@ Rockabyebaby
Bro, I beg u don’t date Titiana pls cos’ I chope her already. U can date Geraldine she’s crazy of u haha.
Titiana, guess what. Think I have fallen in love…
Geraldine Lim,
Wah so fast you already got shot by one of Cupid’s arrows. :)
Section 157(d) allows the alleged sexual assault victim’s sexual history to be used against her on the basis of “generally immoral character”. This shows that victim blaming – refers to victims’ conduct, behaviour, dressing, and sexual history which may be used against them – has been codified in Singapore’s laws. …
—-lets look at the following senario,
there is this so call Geraldine likes rockbaby and rockbaby flirted back. Later during their dates, rockbaby mistaken the signal and doing something illegal and when she cries rape, rockback will be in a fix. Thats what happen for date rape. Again we ask, whose fault? mistaken signal or uncomprehensible behaviour?
sign agreement contract before having sex and aid free certification. Applicable to married couple too :<
I travel often. I also used to get harrassed very often. So I took self defense courses namely aikido, kendo and gaming. Since then I have never looked back. I was trained by Darkness. He is a Sadaherin, a Jedi from the ancient order of purple. In our game, the Sadaherin were like the knight templars. When the universe was only a baby, they were sent out across the galaxy to quell rebellions. Once peace descended on our game. The evil emperor of the known universe hunted and destroyed the order of purple. The Templar taught me this trick of fixing the gaze on a spot between the eyes of a would be opponent before striking like a falcon and even how to use my feminimity to give my abusers a false sense of confidence just before the fall from great heights. Darkness told me once women were deadly even deadlier than men or for that matter spitting cobras, as appearances gives us all the power to conceal our real strenghts. He would often tell me stories of how since ancient times, assassins were usually either women or children. He told me that 99% of the battle was in the mind and it was not so different from managing a dangerous breed of dogs, hence if you behave like a victim, you will be victimized and whatever happens after will never change the fact, you will be victimized again. He also told me after a period of abuse, the victim will even regard it as normal to be used and abused again. He then told me that if I really desired freedom from fear, then the answer lies in being able to conquer myself and rebuild the new me. But it had to begin first in the mind. I had to see my body as a weapon and everyday life as a battlefield, nothing must be taken for granted. He went on to share with me, there are only two types of human beings in this world, predators and the preyed. And I had to learn how to be the former. Now I know at least 7 pressure points to disarm and 3 to paralyze. I am also very good in office politics as I studied Sun Tzu’s, art of war and their weirding ways. I have never been more confident. I have never felt more alive. I am a woman.
Sun Tzu’s, art of war is outdated. Read Alexander the Great.
dear Ghost of YOG,
if you are often seen haunting certain YOG venues like the floating platform, its not your fault.
female ghost of YOG. :)
haa…
hope you dun mind the humour. :)
@ Mike
@ Rockabyebaby
Move aside, Titiana is mine. :-)
She (Titian) is a real titanic…lol
@observers
Is “consent” a foreign concept to you? No means no. Not too difficult to understand, is it?
I’m AWARE of the fact in Singapore even NGOs are GOs(Read as Government organizations)…..uniquely Singapore..WOW!!
Today’s women are not as clever as the newspaper always preach. Got to understand your own physical weakness, even though you are in peacetime, regardless if you’re degree holder or not.
Organization such as AWARE is there to collect gov funding, spend more time in internal power struggle than helping women seeking help.
Not much publicity on this good work – the creation of SABS.
Suggest to create awareness of its working and function with TV-media feature like in Crime-watch or Get-real (English lang. channel)or Tue-night docu (Chinese lang. channel) or equivalent.
Get into account, the ‘immoral’ or sexual history of the defendant too.
AWARE, please do the following first before embarking on your “crusade”:-
1. Define the weaker or suppressed sex.
2. Define equality among the gender.
3. Define “it’s not your fault”.
Despite being a Chinese male, I have always been the first among my peers to respect and champion any justifications to bring the female sex to the same equal standing as any male.
But your actions and policies are clearly aimed at empowering the female species to the point of over-powering the male side.
Why? So we can repeat history again?